Please Stop Telling Me What to Do

 I'm not, it's safe to say, keen on the festive season.

I was telling the Best Beer Buddy the other day why this is - it's not about what he, or other members of my family or friends expect of me specifically, it's about what society generally expects and demonstrates it in the media.

It starts around my birthday in October when, in days of yore, I already start to get uncomfortable about what you're "supposed to do" on your birthday - and how awkward I find it all. By December it reaches a frenzied screech on every advert, every item of social media, EVERYWHERE.

That's three months of "how to do the perfect roast", "how to wrap/choose/whatever the perfect present" coupled with "how are you going to spend your birthday", "what are you doing for Christmas" etc, etc, etc, et bloody cetera.

One of things I love most about the Beer Buddy was the conversation we had in the Victoria in Eastbourne in late October 2010 (yes, it really has stuck in my memory for the sheer relief of it) when he said "do you have plans for Christmas" and I think I just said "I want to run away" - so we ran away to Devon and shared a house for a week.

We walked and went to the pub and played board games and read books.

Thankfully, with no parents or children to take account of and family members happy enough to let us get on with our own thing we mostly do similar things now - but I still feel the pressure of the build up - even if my present-buying and card-writing is pretty minimal now.

If I don't do the social norms I also feel a little guilty for being a curmudgeon.  

Anyhow, the arrival of 1st January starts to mean a reduction in the pressure I feel - and I'm keen to "get back to normal".

Then the other messages start - the ones so keen to see us eat and drink our way in oblivion in December are now urging us to buy healthy things or breaks the habits they were selling us not 10 days ago - it's so...tedious!

So many people so keen to tell us not to drink alcohol, or things with caffeine in, or meat or, <insert prohibition of your choice>. Or, in some ways worse telling us very smugly that they will be following whatever regime to "detox" from Christmas, and that we ought to do likewise otherwise we're killing ourselves or the planet or <insert something else>.

For the record - the only thing we've eaten more of over December is cheese - and that's mostly because of an accidental over-purchase of crackers.

If you want to give something up, or take up the regime of daily Kombuch enemas or whatever - more power to your elbow.  Please, though, for the love of God - stopping telling me to do it too!

Surely it must be time for an amble to the pub now...